Not talking or listening nearly enough

from bookboon.com
image from bookboon.com

I have to admit.  I have fallen off quite a few wagons this summer. Blogging. Exercise.  Praying.  Taking time for me and doing something other than playing “Candy Crush”, calling it my “downtime”.

Bull.  It’s “wastetime”.

It’s been a rough few months, that’s for sure.  Too much work.  Not enough time.  Not enough money.  Not enough sunshine.  Not enough beach time.  Not enough…

Time for change.  Or really, return.  Return to frequent, impactful exercise.  Return to prayer.  Return to making time for me that is TRULY about rest and recharging the batteries. Return to being an engaged mom, instead of relying on Marathon Man to do even the simplest of things. Return to not letting other people’s shortcomings and insecurities be misinterpreted as a reaction to me, but rather a reflection of themselves.  Return to blogging; improving my focus and writing skills, inspiring others and being inspired.  Return to pursuing what I really want and clawing my way out of complacency.  Return to boundaries and limits.  Return to dropping the baggage.

In Mass this morning, friends of ours were sitting two rows up.  They have three beautiful daughters ranging from age 4-12.  The youngest was cuddled next to the oldest, as mom was not with them this morning.  Some time during the Mass, I saw the oldest reach around the youngest and hold the hand of the middle sister.  As I watched them, I was captured by the genuine looks of love and joy on their faces.  They truly adore and love each other.  I realized that I don’t see that very often.   Had I been thinking about a trillion other things, and not trying to be a part of Mass, I would have missed this beautiful exchange between sisters.  How wonderful it was that I witnessed that this morning.  I want to see more of that beauty and I’m committing to doing just that.

I will stop talking to God about the things I need.  I will start listening…really listening…and looking for His voice and His presence.  He’s everywhere.  I just need to stop and focus on Him.

And…delete “Candy Crush”.

Live.  Laugh.  Love.

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